just one more...

I was awoken by the sound of a little fuss from the corner of the room, my daughter had woken up and was feeding David, he was hungry hungry and was looking at her with such content as she was rocking him, I had a smile from ear to ear.  We actually slept really well, they had only come in a couple times during the night and did their best as to not bother us, I was certain we would be going home today.
My oldest daughter called and I told her to just wait and see us when we came home, the same with my folks, although they came down anyway.
The nurse came in after shift change this time, she let us have/eat breakfast and change and hold David before they came in and stripped him and did a complete check-up, he was NOT happy BUT they took the I.V. out and this meant we were MACHINE FREE, yippee HUGE step closer to going home!  The nurse said the doctor would be in shortly and she saw no reason he would not discharge us this afternoon, David was up for one more steroid treatment and then we would be done with those as well.

I was able to shower and clean up the room before my folks showed up, my daughter was content on the couch holding David.  My folks came in and for a second stopped as his bed was stripped, housekeeping was in and out, they stopped and looked hard around the room and then saw him, unhooked and asleep in her arms, my mom cried and my dad hugged me and whispered to me "see he is going to be just fine" I know dad, I know!  I told them we were still waiting on the doctor to come in for rounds and that we would be going home today for sure, the nurse said he was doing really good.  They stuck around for a little while then they had to leave, the Dr had still not been on his rounds, typical `hap's` sigh...
It was early afternoon before the doctor even came into the room, his report was good and his signed discharge papers were even better!  We were checked out and on the road by dinner time and couldn't wait to get home.  

When we came home Julie had brought over dinner and ate with us, took care of David while we ate and I unpacked the car.  She gave David a bath and tucked him into bed then she went back home, it was nice to have her in the same complex.  My oldest daughter was at work and would be by tomorrow to see us, my youngest was tired and was heading to bed herself.  I tucked her in and went back downstairs to turn lights out and clean up a bit more even though tomorrow would be producing a "lazy" day for sure. 
I didn't make it all the way down, I made it to the 'landing' and this is where I sat until I looked at the clock and it was nearly 10 p.m., almost 2 hours later than when my intentions were to clean up and go to bed myself. 

I sat and cried, I sat and I wondered what this all meant, what was god trying to tell me, what lesson did I have to learn from all this, was this a gift or a curse, I mean was ANY of us in a right state of mind to make ANY life decisions for this little boy, WHAT was going to happen, WHAT did his future hold? 
I guess I had just a few things on my mind this night and there I sat, aching to talk to her one more time, just one more "I love you" just one more "I am proud of you" just one more stroke of her hair and a kiss on her forehead, just one more! 

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