5.06.2012

I prayed

Morning came and instead of the room lighting up with the sunshine from outside it lit up with nurses and doctors who were all very concerned over this little guy's health and condition, at a little under 7 lbs, having pneumonia and breathing problems adding in the factor of possible toxic exposure was something that needed to be very closely monitored.
The infectious disease Dr came in and assured me that he would be able to be taken out of the tent and given 4 hour treatments as soon as they finished their rounds and that we would be here at least another night or quite possibly two, this was a relief but at this point all I wanted to do was hold him in my arms and not change another diaper through this plastic tent.

The infectious disease Dr had joined the mornig rounds since we had missed our appointment in clinic at the hospital he came to us, it was a nice feeling with all the other factors in the equation.  The Dr and nurse then began to diassemble the plastic little tent that held his little being for the last 24 hours, you should have seen the stretch on this little guy, it was ALL arms and legs for a good 30 seconds, I went to move in as he opened his eyes and looked straight at me as to say "where have you been" I kissed and swooped him up then sat cuddled in the big wooden rocker, this is where my folks found us nearly 2 hours later, I was surprised that much time has passsed. 

My folks were elated to see he was out of his tent enclosure, my mom took my place in the chair as my dad and I went down for coffee.  My dad was not talkative, well till we got our coffee and headed back out of the cafeteria, he stopped me and said "let's sit in here for a little bit", I of course abliged.  He asked me how I was, I said, of course, "I'm fine dad", "are you guys ok?", he hesitated and he said "we are doing o.k., we are worried about David and you", I could not respond or the flood gates would have opened and I was not prepared this morning to 'go there' so soon in the day **sigh**
We went back up to the room after 20 minutes or so and found my mom in the same spot we had left her, it was a good feeling to see her smile.  I took a quick shower while they were there and before his treatments started, I was prepared for a busy day, I slept decent, but it was not home, that is for sure!

My folks left after 2 hours and that is pushing it, I know they have been throough hell and back the last couple weeks and this was way too much for them to handle, to see his little guy in distress and hooked up to machines and monitors.  The phone call and texts started coming in and my daughters came out a little before noon and stayed till at least dinner time. 
The treatments began and continued through the night.  The hospital staff was SO nice and accomodating to my needs as much as they were to David's, I had never EVER been in the hospital setting with either one of my girl's, this was something pretty foreign to me, but seemed par for the course with all the other cicumstances that surrounded this little heart beat that had now seemed to have finally fallen alseep in my arms. 

The Dr made his final rounds and night had fallen, I was exhausted, the lack of sleep was catching up to me, it was apparent to the nurse's so once the night shift came on and got settled they told me if I needed some help or some sleep just ask and they would take David to their station and feed him for me, I thanked her and thought to myself "no way in hell is he leaving my sight". 
David was responding well to the treatments every 4 hours and since he had had constant exposure for almost 24 hours they moved them to every 6 hours then as needed.  David was not sleep deprived as he had slept for almost 2 days/nights straight, I made th last feeding at 10pm, I rocked him to sleep and then fell onto the couch, I was 'toast'.

I vaguely remember the RT coming in at midnight to give a treatment, I was irritated and it was obvisous, they woke him and it took me almost an hour to get him back to sleep now that he was awake and the medication was now making him "hyper", it was taking a toll on his tiny body.  I was finally able to lay him back down, he was not able to lay with me which would have been SO MUCH easier but the hospital frowned on it since he was SO tiny and the couch was not a suitable bed & the fact he was hooked up to an IV pole.

I was startled by a noise, I rolled over squinting at the bed, saw messy covers then glanced over and saw lines hanging off the bed and then no pole!  I jumped up in panic, almost forgot where I was, then hit the door, swung it open and found 2 nurses sitting with complete joy on their faces holding this little angel whom was sleeping as sound as he would have been in my arms.  The head nurse saw the panic and apologized and said "at the last treatment u were "out" and he was playful" and they wanted me to get some much needed rest, she knew the situation, she was one I confided in, ok, cried with the night we were admitted so I thanked her and went to lay back down and at least gain my barrings back.  I had actually slept for almost 4 full hours and took another hour and a half before they brought him back into the room when he fell alseep and I took a quick shower before the Dr would come back in and hopefully send us home today, I prayed.    










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