tonight was yet another reminder of how precious life really is...
not one single person should ever have to say "good-bye" prematurely to a loved one, let alone their own child, especially when the guilt is proclaimed on you for their careless act...
the ripple effect of all the lives that are affected is endless!

with personally having been effected by suicide a few years ago now, the only thing that was found to be on his person was my home phone number, the questions were never ending...WHY did he not call? WHY would he have thought "no one" could help him? HOW did it get this far? I felt the guilt for many years after until one day I realized, these were HIS issues and not mine, I had extended my ear, my shoulder and my home, he choose not to use them...to him perhaps, he choose the easy way out!

Even though I still miss him, I wonder what kind of man he would be today, as he was about to turn 16 years old and had his entire life ahead of him with endless possibilities...I did say a silent prayer for the family that was affected tonight and hope they can take comfort in knowing that the loss although tragic was nothing they could have avoided.

I sent my daughters a text message at that moment, told them I loved them and missed them!


life's little reminder's..

as we took our evening walk..it was cool with a slight breeze, the sun was about an hour from setting as it shed warmth on our backs...

as David relaxed in his stroller, we rounded a corner just as the wind picked up a gust, David took a big breath then let out a small sigh, as he threw one hand to the wind, I excited him by making a windy sound, he raised both hands up as if to let the wind carry him away, carefree and totally unsuspecting...

the innocence and freedom of such a feeling of the wind blowing, flowing your hands as if you can hold it, the wind whipping through your hair and embracing you face...

we have daily reminders of our freedom and nature's blessings, have you recognized one today? especially on this Memorial day, I thought an appropriate reflection!


WoW! I did it!! I followed through with a project, a major accomplishment if you will..I feel like I am walking on air.

I am, as you know working on a book for my son, an explanation for him, of him. In the meantime, which was an AWESOME book also, found some of my writing's and decided "why not" and compiled them into a book of their own along with some of my favorite photos, also taken by yours truly.

I told very little people what I was doing, even my closest of friends and family. They were to say the least, shocked, and wowed, yet not at all surprised I was able to pull it off. A feeling I can not even put in words, I simply say, "It's just what I do" {wink} GREAT title if I don't say so myself.

I let a co-worker read the entire book as it was still a rough draft, she was speechless and in tears. I amazed my mother the following day with the news and then gave the review to my father, the last page of the 40 page book is dedicated to him, who he is in 'my' eyes. My father was reduced to a somber `sob`, it was extremely bitter-sweet.

The fact that this has such an impact at this small of a level makes me a giant in my own skin. I want to SCREAM at the highest of mountains, I WROTE A BOOK, although I would probably be admitted for being crazy in public, but it would be so worth it and who knows I would probably have excellent material for a 2nd, even 3rd book! HaHa

I am still me, the same person who struggles with "what-ifs" just with a HUGE smile and love for my life just how it is!

I will continue to press on with my son's book and believe as I was taught, " the sky is the limit "

p.s. in case I've "peeked" your interest


Time Flies ..

after a major wardrobe malfunction, aka: computer crash and some minor repairs I am back up and running..

I have completed and published a book, as well as continue to work on the one I have teased you with the last few entries! TeeHee

I will stay focused now and give you more of what you crave, well, at least come back for more of..

wishing you a GREAT & blessed day..till we meet again!


Pg 2 .. minus some photos .. =)

a baby said to god 'they tell me you are sending me to earth tommorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?'God said 'your mom will be waiting for you and take care of you'

the baby further asked 'but tell me god, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but sing & smile and be happy' God said 'your mom will sing for you and will also smile for you, you will feel your mom's love and be very happy'

the baby asked god 'how will I be able to understand when people talk to me if I don't know the language?'God said 'your mom will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience & care, your mom will teach you how to speak'

the baby seemed confused 'what am I going to be when I want to talk to you?'God said 'your mom will place your hands together and teach you how to pray'

the baby now concerned 'who will protect me'God said 'your angel will defend you even if it means risking her own life'
the baby began to cry 'I will be sad because I will not see you anymore'God said 'your mom will always talk to you about "me" and will teach you the way to come back to "ME", even though I will always be next to you'

at that very moment there was much peace in heaven, but the voices from Earth could be heard, the baby asked one last thing from God 'if Im to leave right now, please tell me my mom's name'
God said 'you will simply call her your "HEART" mom'


HERE IT IS...well, the INTRO page

There comes a time in every one's life when they have to say "good-bye". You pray it is much later and not sooner.
When the time comes, you may have some choices to make and decisions to ponder. You don't always have the time to decide what might be in the best interest of those that will be affected and/or left behind.
You do the best you can with what you have! THESE will be the words you will live by..