if this is what it {truly} feels like ..

then I know I completely lost my mind today. . .

When someone makes a statement, a really really bad statement to you, at you and you begin to shake uncontrollably, immediately deny that the words you just heard were not just spoken to you but perhaps to someone else, yet you are the person in receipt.

I'm tired, exhausted and I have no more fight in me, literally, it is more a mode self worth and explanation of how bad it feels or perhaps realization of what it would possibly feel like if the shoe was on the other foot. 
I mean when I was a kid, in a hurry, late for the bus and put my shoes on the wrong feet, I felt funny, kinna weird to walk, but never debilitated, where did this analogy EVER come from? 

I feel more compelled at this point to reassure myself that I am a good person and wonder, lately quite often, if I was put in this relationship to help someone through a rough spot in their life and maybe, just maybe someday I will be looked upon as someone who is trustworthy, noble and self-preserved!!

things are always changing, one must stay true to oneself while maintaining the ability to accept the change happening around them..
it goes without saying & SO worth repeating - in order to love someone else you must first love yourself! !