the D word...


disappointment is being in {extreme} pain while going through a major life changing experience, illness, you are promised a visit, a meal, good company and great conversation & knowing it quite possibly may just  be the highlight of your day when in the end you are left waiting, wondering and sending "your not on your way are you?"

I was unfotunately the recepient of such a message and I was devastated to say the least!!  Im not devastated for my benefit I am so for the hurt and disappointment I caused someone who was counting on me to be there and I wasn't.  It was not intentional but that somehow has no bearing on the way it had broken someone's spirit.

I got the message that "it is o.k., there is a lot of pain today and I am ready for bed, yes this early".  This makes it real confirming that the slighest of visit time would have brought a little relief today...
The bravery is more that admirable and the willingness to forgive makes the friendship one that is un-breakable...
for that I must take comfort in knowing it IS ok, NOT acceptable, but understood and that I will have an opportunity to make it right!

I have been disappointed and devastated~I take to heart the words and the gestures of making something happen that may I say/suggest or promise. So I can be this hard on myself because I know first hand the effects of both and at the same time!

"I am human and to error is human to fogive is divine"

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