confession

sooooo as you can tell, the book is slow going yet a chore that will take me sometime to get through mentally as well as physically.  It is something that I feel I owe to David.


I could not be more proud of him and the person he is becoming.  David is a happy soul, an old soul, a soul that has been sent to me so I can see that things needed to slow down, take a different path than where my life was leading me.  For this I do not question his existence, rather I'm left to ponder the process.


I have had to come to grips that I am raising my deceased sister's child, her first child, a boy and one she was looking so forward to raising to carry on our family name.  I am now facing the future with a disabled child, as David is now being treated for much more than his chronic Asthma and frequent bouts of pneumonia.  I am at odds with the fact that I have to make sure important decisions for someone who is so pure and so innocent, but I guess that is why I am here?!?!


In retrospect my life without David would be nothing at this point as he has changed me, my views and my entire existence.  So I will say a silent prayer for my aching heart and blow a kiss to heaven and hope it travels at light speeds.

today....

Less is MORE!

TODAY....

i am thankful for my life!!

GUILT...

....I can not continue to carry the guilt of not being a good mom due to circumstances we all agreed upon.

We all spoke of the choices that lied ahead and all agreed this was the ONLY alternative, little did we know the work it would intel or the toll it would take on us separately or how it would effect our relationships with one another.

I know I have been pulled in multiple directions and can only pray words spoken in anger were just as such & not regret for what the situation has become!

this I know...

I am truly blessed!
THANK You god for my life!

PATIENCE is a virtue!

Good/GREAT things DO come to those who wait!

I live with NO regrets!

TRUE love never says a WORD!