I am not afraid to admit it, I feel slighted, I feel left
out and I feel like as if there is a whole other life being built without me –
you say it’s simply without my body present, but both truth and reality, I am
not there and you are starting new adventures, receiving well wishes, much
deserved comments and posting more on social media than you have in the seven
years I have known you – so, I won’t apologize for feeling like this has
nothing to do with me at all.
By the time I get to your destination, the newness will have
worn off, the well wishes will have stopped along with the thoughts that
already exist of us being apart – it has and continues to be what “you” deserve
and how brave others think you are and have been to make such a huge move,
little do they know – and that is exactly it, they won’t know, ever the sacrifices
I have made for us (in my eyes, and solely for you in your eyes).
I am very well aware of what you have at stake, the fact
that you have to sit “in a box” without your family, you have a new job to do,
acclimate to, and still, you think I should feel sorry for you, understand that
you miss me when you have shown me nothing. I had to readjust my entire life,
once again, to accommodate someone else, and got nothing in return (I hate that
you made me think I was “owed” something) and triple-fold the responsibilities
and most of which I have absolutely NO control over, literally, I am left in
this house that is ALL yours, NOTHING about it is mine, yet I have full
responsibility – tell me again how that is fair and I have not the slightest
reason to feel as if I have been and will continue to be left out?! You have
mentioned NOTHING about what I have offered and had to sacrifice nor the responsibilities
that I now have…
The excitement I will have when and if I finally get to make
the trip will have worn out their welcome in the eyes of your loyal followers
and the tags, yeah, thanks, I like to see and hear from other people what you
have posted and what you are talking about! Social Media, once again, the
source of bad decisions and forever markers of what your life means to you and
how others perceive you and how great are!!
You just don’t get it, you never will and the fact that I
would have to bring it up to you – is proof enough that is doesn’t matter, it
never will – you probably didn’t even notice I didn’t even attempt to make an effort
this time. Me being overwhelmed wasn’t enough, the dynamics of this past week(s)
weren’t even distantly close, it was all about you feeling like I was resenting
you….that is just OUTSTANDING!
I went out of my way to make you feel like you took a little
of me/us with you and extended a lot of surprises along the way, I am still
looking for the slightest bit of anything that even resembles you missing me –
No comments:
Post a Comment